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Writer's pictureok2vent

Tired of fear

Why is fear so powerful? Being scared as kids seems like a joke in hindsight. I remember one of my biggest fears was aliens, the kind from outside this planet. I think I watched too many shows and theories that made me have a fear that never happened. I must be so useless; no alien would actually want to kidnap me, not in over 40 years.



At 35, the real fears started to emerge, and after 38, well, 'shit hit the fan.' Is it still called fear if it's actually a reality? What do we call it when it's awful and happening to you, and you are also scared of it? You didn’t expect it? The thing is, it can be anything. I don’t want to delve into all the ways adults live through fear, barely holding things together or just watching them fall apart without a way to put them back together again. It’s like watching a glass break in front of you and not having any power to stop it.


On days when I feel my fears and am unable to sleep through the night, I hope aliens come to get me, and I won’t have my fears anymore. They haven’t come; they're not real. My fears now are real, and they are awful. How will I survive and get through the next day? The worst part about fear is not knowing what to do and what would be good to do. Where do I start?


Maybe, this is where the start is. Right here on this site, through venting with ok2vent.

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