Everyone seems to talk about cutting people off from their lives due to toxic traits or behaviors, but what if you're the one who got cut off? How do you handle losing boyfriends, friends or family?
Grieving can be an essential part of processing this loss. You may miss the relationship and recall both the good and bad moments. But it's crucial to evaluate whether that relationship was actually good for you. Maybe that person triggered a negative side of you, and if so, you're likely better off without them—and they might be better off too.
It’s important to recognize that you can thrive and achieve more without certain people in your life. Personally, I’ve never enjoyed talking on the phone; I prefer face-to-face conversations. Some people love long phone calls, but for me, it's a waste of time—I could be doing anything else instead of listening to someone ramble. Recently, people have asked me to hang out after work or on weekends, but I’ve started saying no. I don't want to rearrange my schedule for people who don't add value to my life. I'm done feeling guilty or obligated to make others happy. My peace and happiness are more important to me than theirs—so, sorry not sorry.
In the past few years, I’ve lost people I thought were family and friends, but life went on without them. New friends came along, bringing better goals and inspiration. I missed the old relationships, but now it's clear it was for the best. Without those distractions, I'm more focused on my personal and career goals. I’m dedicating time to improve myself intellectually, physically, and prioritizing my health.
I grieved, cried, thought, talked, vented, complained, and even screamed about my loss. But after all that, I realized I gained more of myself in return. I've grown, learned, and set new goals. The slate is clean, and now I’m on the path to discovering my passions and life's missions.
It's time to focus less on them and more on me—it's time to be selfish.
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